What 2020 Has In Store For You (1)
Since many of you seem to have enjoyed my previous “horoscopes” which some “genuine” astrologers decided to repost with my permission, here's a new batch for the crazy year ahead. In two parts to avoid pages taking forever to load. Please, note however that even though my predictions are somewhat (extremely!) far-fetched, all the planet transits are not something I have made up. So they may contain some elements of truth.
Aries: Life is a bitch! The planet conspiracy in Capricorn may
drive you nuts. Try not to lose your head.
Libra: You too will be a target for the evil conspiracy in Capricorn.
Better not let the devil add vodka to your Bloody Marys. Sober up!
Taurus: Uranus won't let go of your horns as if you were
a racing car. Mind the speed cameras.
Scorpio: Uranus won't stop pestering you and bringing out
the worst in you. You, nasty creepy crawly!
Gemini: Neptune will encourage you to become a coach potato.
Try to keep your focus on one thing at a time.
Sagittarius: Neptune might make you feel out of step.
You would benefit from practising martial arts.
To be continued: more signs tomorrow...
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Tags: humour, eyael, horoscope2020
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